Getting cranky

So I am now in my 4th day of leg immobilization.  And although I am grateful to have found an illness which matches my lifestyle (sitting in bed all day, reading the internet and smoking) I find that it is beginning to get on my nerves.  Simple things like sitting on a toilet become awkward at best and downright painful at worst.  It doesn't help either that I had a "doctor" who wouldn't give me "proper" pain pills, instead relying on some high class aspirin crap that has a serious risk of stomach ulcers attached to it.  Who needs it, if you can't even get a little buzz on.

Anyway, do you remember that TV show where they show these two older guys from the back sitting in a theater criticizing movies that were being shown on the screen?  Well, this post is going to be like that.  But instead of movies and two old men in a theater, it's smithster11 typing from bed.

Let's start from what is the root of the problem here.  I'm horny.  Truth be told (and I don't know if I'm alone in this) horniness has several ugly outcomes.  It's hard to fall asleep and that in itself is enough to make anyone cranky.  For God's sakes, I woke up at 3:30 a.m. this morning for no apparent reason and as much as I'd like to take a nap, it elludes me.

As a result of all this, my fantasies are taking a darker turn.  I'm thinking of doing certain things to certain people that really never occurred to me before.  Oddly enough, no one seems to be interested when I tell them I have a broken leg and a cast - whatever happened to hiring the handicapped?

But I always seek to look at the bright side and so far I think there are two things.  I ordered this pretty cool rubber thing (no, not THAT rubber thing) that you slide over your cast so that you can take a shower and it arrived yesterday.  You have no idea of how something so simple can cause you so much joy - particularly as it effectively ends my battle with the bidet, of which I'll tell you there were several comic episodes (see recent update to Vice - there is a downside).

Oh wait, I said there were two bright sides...  It is...ummm, hmmm let's see.  Oh yeah, I found an app for playing Scrabble on-line with faceless players.  It has a chat feature.  I just hope I don't forget which chat room I'm in and try to hit up some poor Scrabble playing granda for a blowjob.